Surely you’re aware of the 11th Commandment: “Mothers Shalt Not Get Sick.” And, as my friend Jen Singer pointed out, “If thouest doth, shoot for the weekend.”

A cold the likes of which only Mucinex could eradicate confined me to bed from Sunday until last evening, which is why I’ve been a tish absent from the old blog. I hope you didn’t miss me too much.

I really don’t understand why anyone would name a medication Mucinex. It’s just gross.

Anyway, I had Five (aka George) in the doctor’s office last Friday to determine whether or not he had strep. He did not, but whatever he had he passed to me. As I’ve already mentioned.

As we tried to entertain ourselves whilst waiting for the doctor, George began reading signs on the wall. He’s a relatively new reader, so he finds it most fun to attempt to read everything in sight.

After he correctly sounded out the word “children,” he attempted the word “safe.”

“Saf,” he declared, with a short “a” and a silent “e.”

“This is a tricky one, George,” I tried to explain. You see how there are two vowels on either side of this consonant?”

“I don’t see any continents.”

“No, conSOnants,” I clarified.

“What are you talking about?”

“Never mind. In this case, which I have no idea how to explain, the ‘e’ on the end makes the ‘a’ say ‘ay’ and the ‘e’ is silent.”

“Why is it silent?”

“I don’t know. You just don’t say it.”

“Oh. Because it’s inappropriate?”

Silence.

Two very blue eyes staring at me without blinking waiting for an explanation.

More silence.

Exhale and redirect.

“George, what’s 2 plus 2?”

***

What’s the trickiest reading rule you’ve yet to attempt to explain to your child? (and if you’ve found a particularly successful way to do it, do share).

On another note, endorsements for You Cannot Be Serious: and 32 Other Rules that Sustain a (Mostly) Balanced Mom are trickling in, so it appears we’re still on target for a May release!